to whom it may concern

just incase this gets to the presidency of this state...
my names are edmund maina, the second born of a humble family of a luhya man who traced the woman of his life   deep into the roots of the mugumo tree.

sir, i know you dont have much time so i wil first finish with you....i have an issue with the tax man, honestly i dont earn any much than what you spend for breakfast....but thats not the issue am contended with it coz all fingures are not the same anyway but my issue is, this tax nigga cannot steal from me more than what i spend on food,church offering,water and electricity combined, honestly its not fair. i pay tax on all the things i use; food, clothing, transport name it then at the end of it all what i remain with the tax man is there to grab it..., is this how you planned to fund all your projects i wish i was clever enough then to ask where you are going to get the moneys for the laptops, free maternity, stadia and all you promised i thought you had a way to fund them little did i know you will drain a laptop and a stadia out of my pocket.
your "excellency", i hope i spelt that right just incase you doubt my wits i dont have an issue with the kdf  staying in somalia but am scared about my tomorrow will i even see it, is it only my blood that can sustain there stay there, every evening after i make tax for you , i go to a local joint where we take cheap liqour as we chat politics but of late there has been a constant agenda "death" kindly if that doesnt freak you it does me...if you have television at statehouse i bet you have seen that.

sir i dont wanna raise so much issues with you i know your clock doesnt have 24hours, no wonder they say the president doesnt have time. you are at liberty to read along or end it there....

dear landlord only God knows how many times i have hugged your neck with a rope in my head, do you ever stop to wonder what extortionists do?? i bet not, have you ever seen one oooow yea i know you said no...lemmi show you one, my friend stand infront of a mirror and whatever you see before you is an extotionist in his ugliest form
i like leaving people in suspence just incase you want to know why...... am door no G1 feel free to walk in anytime except meal's time, i dont wanna have the pleasure of denying you food.

i really lack words for you guys.
second part of "to whom it may concern" is up shortly....
if i havent hurt you or talked badly about you please dont be offended am coming after you....

yours in christ

edmund maina
senior noice-maker